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Look at that look on your face. Oh wait…you can’t look at it because it’s on your face.
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*reading tumblr* “I learned today that flies have cute little vaginas…” Wait… I said that!
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There’s free Chick-fil-A there; I’m fucking there!
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Oh look it has my last name on it…oh wait…it’s mine!
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“So you’re a nuts and sausage girl?” - friend
“Yes, I’m a nuts and sausage girl.” - Clarissa
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I have some somewhere, but I like using my mouth. *opening a package (does not have scissors)*
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Wanna taste his meat? *looking at pork chops*
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Those potatoes are da shit.
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Your meat looks hard. *looking at pork chops*
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Not because it has a panda, but because it has balloons…PINK BALLOONS! *discussing a t-shirt*
The nonsensical utterings of Clarissa
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